Monday, August 20, 2018

Let me entertain you

Grand Canyon sunset tour Dec’17
                                                     
I had a dental appointment last week and as customary when getting X-rays, the dental assistant asked me if there was any chance I might be pregnant.

I laughed and said "Nope."  

I told her that I've chosen to be childfree. She then told me that she was thinking about that choice for herself. 

At the end of my appointment, I handed her my business card and told her that I blog about my childfree lifestyle. 

We discussed how nobody talks about choosing to be childfree. 

By the way, Hi, if you are reading this. I know your name but I won't write it here.  You have inspired today's post!

I have no problem being vocal about my childfree choice. I am very secure and comfortable with my decision.

Long ago, I realized my purpose in life is to entertain people. 

How  I entertain people...well, that has been a life long discovery.

Flashback to 3rd grade—I’m in my bedroom, trying to memorize a poem to read in front of the class. Something about a turkey flying out of the oven and ricocheting around the room.

 I remember practicing that word, ricochet,,,,

I so desperately wanted to be funny and awesome and express myself the way I felt inside. But in reality, I stumbled and did not perform the way I wanted to. 

All of my childhood piano and violin recital performances were less than inspired. Technically I was fine, but I was not passionate about classical music. Music comes naturally to me but public performance, not so much. 

As a teenager, I discovered that it was very easy for me to learn to play pop music on the violin and so I spent a couple of years developing a massive repertoire.

I got paid very well to play the Beatles and ABBA and Disney songs on my 100-year-old German violin. 

I just assumed that music was my calling. Until I realized it wasn't. 

That life lesson hurt. 

That dark period of my life was more difficult for me than losing my mother. 

I lost my identity, my focus. And for the first time in my life, I had no clue what I was going toor wanted to—do.

The next 3 years were a blur of network marketing meetings, self-help seminars, bizarre women in business sessions..

All of this led to a relationship that led to another relationship which led to me finding the best job I ever had which led to enough money to take time to travel and discover what makes me passionate...which turns out to be storytelling.

                     My writing room at sunset
This really should be no surprise, I am naturally chatty as hell. Most of my early report cards would say 

“LeNora is a good student, she just talks too much during class.”

I never enjoyed writing, it was a chore during my school days but I always got great marks. My best work was when I would be telling a true life story about myself or others.

Grade 10 English class, I wrote about my childhood and most of the kids in my class ended up asking me if they could read it. I have no idea what they thought about it but they were curious enough to read.

I can list a handful of moments that would serve as hints to my calling, but I am in, let’s say the beta testing stage right now. No need to get ahead of myself. 

But I have a strong feeling about this. When I write and hit the point I’m trying to make, my toes tingle. 

Based on my past experience, I am aware that this won’t be the only creative path I take. I have other areas I feel called to pursue. Public speaking and composing film scores are big ones. 

All in due time. 

Life snowballed in such a way that I can focus 💯 of my time and resources to writing.  So I play around with what feels good and what gets a reaction.

What is getting the biggest reaction is the topic of choosing not to birth and raise humans.
 (Childfree)

It really isn’t a surprise. After all, I started writing about it because there are so few people who discuss it openly. 

Now is the time for my chatty personality to align with my purpose to entertain humanity.

This is a very real issue-choosing not to have children.  Men and women are feeling pressure or guilt or confusion about how they want to live their lives because it doesn’t follow the social norm. 

As I said at the start of this post, I am secure and confident in my choice. It is a natural choice for me.

No one has to understand or even agree with my choice, but here is the funny thing—most parents I talk to completely understand why I wouldn’t want to raise children. 

And for those few people who tell me “ oh, you’ll change your mind one day..”

I just smile and hand them my business card and they get the message.

Ha!


Sincerely,

LeNora Faye
Bitchy Bookkeeper 
Almost an Author 
Former Fantastic Violinist 

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